Thursday, 7 July 2011

Our First Phone Call

Linda has agreed to allow me to share her thoughts about our first phone call.

I really wanted to talk with you because I am quite shy and I wanted you to be comfortable for our first visit. I assumed that talking with you would help you and I overcome the initial awkwardness of meeting new people. I was also feeling quite left out by this and Kevin were corresponding quite regularly (many times a day in fact) and the kids and you were doing the same. It was during this period of the reunion that I felt sure that I was never going to be loved by you and that the "division" in my family was sure to come. My feelings were all over the map. I was experiencing anxiety like I have only ever heard about. My mantra was "Dear God, help me".

The time was here that I would need to pick up the phone and talk with you. "Dear God, Your will be done in this me, help us." I don' t really remember what we talked about but I do remember hanging up the phone and feeling a calm and tranquility that I had not felt previously. I had made another step in welcoming you into our family. God was pleased.

Looking back...lots of pain but I had the definite assurance that God wanted this. What could I do...deny God? He was asking me to accept my husband's daughter. How could I say no? What could I have done differently? Hindsight tells me that had I not accepted you, I would have caused division in my family.


I remember before our call I was terribly nervous. I'm shy, you're shy...are we going to sit in silence for ten minutes before one of us has enough courage to speak? You called at exactly the time you said you would, and when I answered I was stunned. You're not shy on the phone! In fact, you're quite chatty, and it was great. You were completely friendly, welcoming, just lovely. After we hung up, I was so disappointed our call was over. I could have talked with you for a few hours. I'm so glad the anxiety was gone. I too felt at peace.


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